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HEADLINES
STIFF KITTIE
FINISHES CD!!!!!!!
May 01, 2006
Its the moment the band, and SK fans have been waiting 5 years for! STIFF
KITTIE...SAVES THE WORLD is now available! With 17 tracks, this CD is packed full of catchy tunes, memorable
lyrics, and a sense of humor you could only get from Kevin and Steve. The album, recorded in-house and released own the bands
on label "Levitation Records," features the songs Chicks Are Weird, Song For the Broken-Hearted, Girls Fart, Food in the
Tummy, I Know A Little Guy (Named E.T.), The Prom Song, Cabernet In The Parlor, and many more songs, skits, and suprises!
All of the artwork on the CD is custom designed by the band and professionally printed. The CDs are available for only SEVEN
DOLLARS!!! Dont pass up the opportunity to get one of these musical gems, a must have for you CD collection and unlike
anything you've heard before! Three cheers for STIFF KITTIE!!!
STIFF KITTIE'S PUBLIC DEBUT!
Dec 22, 2005
After wanting to play there for years, Stiff Kittie finally played an
acoustic show at their favorite coffee hangout, THE BEAN SCENE. The house was totally packed, with people sitting on the floor
in their very first official "Public" concert. The show opened with an awesome slowed down rendition of Chicks Are Weird,
with special guest, Santa Claus on the bongos. Of course, what SK Christmas concert would be complete without Christmas songs!?
The highlight of the show was Bad Dream, one of their newest songs, which progressed into a Christmas medley during the middle
of the song. Silver Bells was amazing with the whole place singing along. It sounded like Christmas Carolers! The show ended
with a bang with Jenny (867-5309) and The Pretender's 500 Miles, with the whole place singing along and the boys going crazy.
This was a great public debut for Stiff Kittie, and the Bean Scene has welcomed them to come back anytime! They WILL be back!
STIFF KITTIES 2nd HALLOWEEN CONCERT GOES PLUGGED
Oct 29, 2005
Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who came to support us! We haven't had
that much fun since...the last concert! It really was a great time and we had a total blast playing for everyone. It was great
to see some old fans and LOTS of new faces. We hope you all had a great time and will come see us again for our annual Christmas
Concert!
Steve and Kevin would like to thank a few people for making this show happen:
First, a BIG BIG thanks to David and Jim. We couldn't do it without you guys. Thanks for all the hard work
in such a short amount of time. We love you guys! Second, a big thanks to Steve's parents, for putting up with our noise for
the last month. We appreciate you letting us practice in the house...even at 11 pm. We owe a SUPER big thanks to Bonnie and
Mike Walker. They were so kind to let us use the Clubhouse, help set up, and help tear down. A million thanks to you guys
for making this happen! Much thanks to Blake for video taping the show. We played so long we ran out of tape halfway through!
Also a big thanks to Erica for all the help decorating, shopping, and help during practice. You're the best! Stiff Kittie
loves to play no matter what, but it wouldn't mean as much without our fans there. We want to thank every single one of you who
came out to see us. It means the world to be playing for the people we love. As we continue to evolve with every show, it's
so awesome to see all of your faces as we grow and change for every concert. Stiff Kittie Loves you! And finally....the big
man upstairs must be a Stiff Kittie fan...because he always lets us pull it off. With all the trouble we had pulling this
show together with just a few practices, we did it! Thanks again to everyone! You guys were awesome singers and dancers
and we can't wait to do it again at Christmas!!!
STIFF KITTIE & KNOX April 25, 2004 Knox the well-known online movie creator,
known for creating some of the craziest "klaymations" has asked Stiff Kittie, the craziest songwriting duo to help write
songs for his movies. It is rumored that as soon as Steve returns from California, Steve and Kevin will help write for
Knox's upcoming movie series, "The Wreck." If you'd like to hear more check out Knox's website... http://knoxskorner.com or
www.newgrounds.com.
A ROCKIN DECEMBER
December 23, 2003
Wowing an intimate crowd against the soft glow of a burning fireplace,Stiff Kittie played
their annual Christmas show "Stiff Kittie Ate Your Christmas Tree 2003." This year, they boys opened up with their favorite
christmas classic, Burl Ive's Jingle Jingle Jingle--Stiff Kittie style. Kevin was hilarious on his wooden flute while
Steve's voice sparkled in this wonderful rendition. All the classics were played, including a special version of ET
with both of them doing kazoo solos, and a home made shaker pedal invention used during Girls Fart. It
was hilarious! The high point of the concert however had to be Christmas Cookies, a special song written just for
that concert. It started off sounding like a sweet song about the joys of Christmas...but turned out to be a song about christmas
cookies! During the song, special cookies were passed out to the crowd made with love by Steve's grandma. They even had double
sprinkles! Once everyone had a cookie they started singing "So take yo cookie and throw it in tha air, take yo cookie and
throw it in the air, take yo cookie and throw it in tha air, and eat it like you just don't care!" Everyone in the crowd was
waving their cookies in the air...it was so funny! Another great Stiff Kittie concert! Can't wait until next year!!
STIFF KITTIE WEAR LAUNCHES CHILDRENS CLOTHING LINE
December 1, 2003
Stiff Kittie Wear recently announced a new clothing line for children just in time
for the holiday season. Stiff Kiddies boasts "comfortable, stylish threads for the little people" Look for the SKW
Stiff Kiddies line at most major department stores.
STIFF KITTIE HOLDS PRESS CONFERENCE
November 4, 2003
At the request of MTV and patient fans, Stiff Kittie held a press conference to
talk about their debut album release. At the attention of millions, Stilwell made this statement: "We apologize for the time
it is taking to make this CD. But all of the hard work and extra time will be worth it in the end. We believe that this CD
will bring joy to everyone around the world and we are confident that we will bring peace to the Middle East, and end many
other hostile situations around the globe. The Prime Ministers of both North and South Korea have already pre-ordered CD's.
And although it has not been confirmed, we think that Osama Bin Laden is even trying to secretly order one. Indeed,
Stiff Kittie will save the world."
STIFF KITTIE PLAYS COOKING SHOW
October 14, 2003
During their recent trip to Europe to promote their upcoming debut album, Stiff
Kittie appeared on the Swedish cooking show "Cooking With Irene and Helga." Not only did the boys play a fantastic version
of "Food in the Tummy," but they also helped the hosts of the show cook a tuna noodle casserole. As expected, things went
a little crazy and Kevin ended up needing minor emergency care after eating some dish soap, which he mistakenly thought was
syrup. "Sweden was so cool. Every girl there is hot, blonde, and talks funny," said Stilwell.
STIFF KITTIE FOR GOVERNER
October 1, 2003
One week before the historic California recall election, Steve, as an enthusiastic
new resident of the Golden State, began campaining for governer. He posted hundreds of handmade signs on notebook paper with
sharpie that read "You Need Stiff Kittie In Yo' City." After touring the state for his campaign, he was informed
on live TV by a third grader from Clark Elementary School in San Jose that exchange students were not eligible to run
for governer. Flabbergasted, he gave the boy a noogie and ran away.
STIFF KITTIE PLAYS SCREWLEARNINGAPALOOZA
June 6, 2003
Last Thursday Stiff Kittie took time out of their busy schedule to play
their annual Screwlearningapalooza with special guest Thank You For the Rain. Thank You For the Rain played some acoustic
rock to get the audience's rockin' juices flowin' for Stiff Kittie. Once Stiff Kittie took the stage they played everyone's
favorite hits including Food in the Tummy and I Know a Little Guy Named E.T.. As usual Stiff Kittie had a special appearence,
this time a mime that they had found in downtown Wichita. They offered the mime some money for booze and he
agreed to play the show playing bongos and drums.
STIFF KITTIE INVITED TO PLAY EMMY'S
March 22, 2003
Today, Stiff Kittie was Invited to play at the annual 2003 Emmy awards. The band declined to
play in order to continue work on their debut cd. When asked about the Emmy's Kevin Stilwell replied, "we were really
honored to be given the chance to play but we have to get this cd recorded and there's nothing going to stop us now."
The band hopes to finish recording late summer 2003 and then spend time putting finishing touches on the cd.
SK GETS PRIME PROMO SPOT
Feb 8, 2003
The new Stiff Kittie Wear clothing line was unveiled on a recent episode
of the teen drama Dawson's Creek. The modest, yet sexy shirt worn by actress Katie Holmes has sparked a demand for the clothing
line at fashion giants such as Saks and Macy's. "Soon, it won't be uncommon to see celebs like JLo and Julia Roberts sporting
SK Wear in their music videos and movies," says the band.
JINGLE BELL ROCK
December 22, 2002
Stiff Kittie played their first holiday concert, packed with Stiff Kittie Classics
and other holiday favorites. Highlights included a suprise visit by Santa, who played the drums on How We Do Our Thang,
and also a SK rendition of Burl Ive's Jingle Jingle Jingle. "I just came for the food," says Sarah Kallail, audience member.
STIFF KITTIE LAUNCHES CLOTHING LINE
Dec 15, 2002
The guys of Stiff Kittie have announced that they will be launching their
own brand of clothing for 2003. Stiff Kittie Wear promises to be "Good fun for the whole family" says Stillwell."
"Clothes that make you want to blow bubbles and frolic in a field," Shippy adds.
STIFF KITTIE SUES WYNONA RYDER
October 14, 2002
Although kept quiet by the media, it has been reported that Stiff Kittie
is suing actress Wynona Ryder, who is already facing criminal charges for shoplifting thousands of dollars worth of clothes
and accessories from Saks Fifth Avenue. The band claims that Ryder, a long-time Stiff Kittie fan, stole one of their
microphones at a recent private concert in NY. "We told her we would drop the charges if she would make out with us,"
says the band. The hearing is scheduled for November 1st.
KEVIN TURNS 21, GETS BANNED FROM BAR
September 29, 2002
It was reported that during celebrations of Kevin's 21st birthday at a local bar, things got out of
hand causing the Stiff Kittie member to be banned from the bar for life. Rumors report that the highly intoxicated Stilwell,
along with bandmate E.T., attempted to start a nude nacho cheese wrestling match in the middle of the bar. A female
eyewitness recalls the incident: "It was kinda hot actually...especially seeing E.T. all covered in nacho cheese....what a
sexy guy. But it just got a little out of hand. Especially when Kevin started doing what he called "ball" room dancing."
Stilwell and E.T. deny the accusations, claiming they were at Steve's house playing CandyLand and drinking apple juice.
STIFF KITTIE TOURS KC
August 23, 2002
Stiff Kittie successfully finishes tour to Kansas City. The band played at several venues and even met
and appeared alongside singer/ song writer Eric Clapton. The band even had time to take a few pictures in a photo shoot with
various Victoria Secret models for an ad campaign promoting "Fun underwear that makes you feel silly inside."
Check Pictures from the KC Tour
STEVE GETS WISDOM TEETH OUT, CAN'T RECORD
July 20, 2002
Recording was put on hold yet again due to Steve getting all four
of his wisdom teeth removed. When asked if his recovery was going well, Steve replied "Yshh, erveshingz ishz goonng
grt. I shzld beezshingin agnn bbery zhoon."
GOD BLESS AMERICA, SK PLAYS THE 4TH
July 2, 2002
Stiff Kittie will be performing this year at Rita's in Newton. The boys plan to do their own rendition of The Star Spangled
Banner, among other patriotic songs and Stiff Kittie Classics.
KEVIN & STEVE GET MAD AT EASTER BUNNY, START FIGHT
March 30, 2002
It was reported that over Easter weekend, the boys of Stiff Kittie went to visit the Easter Bunny at their local mall--but
the holiday visit turned sour within minutes. It is not known what caused the band to tag team the unsuspecting mall
employee, but one eyewitness says she saw the whole incident unfold: "I remember the boys going up to sit on the bunny's lap before
my 3 year old daughter. They demanded to know where Easter eggs came from, and when the bunny insisted that he didnt
know and that he was just an employee working for minimum wage at the mall, the boys just started wrestling him to the ground.
After several minutes of chaos, one of them pulled his bunny mask off and shouted "AH HA! ITS AN IMPOSTER! LETS GO FIND THE
REAL EASTER BUNNY!" Afterwards they ran off, but stopped at Orange Julius before leaving the mall. And thats all
i remember."
E.T. IN THEATERS
March 22, 2002
E.T. IN THEATRES!!! Support E.T. and the members of Stiff Kittie as their DJ E.T. rereleases his debut movie E.T. as
E.T. the Extra Terrestrial. E.T. stresses that his focus will be on Stiff Kittie, and that this will not slow him and
his band mates down as they continue recording their debut album, although he plans on getting "hella drunk tonight!"
at his movie release party this evening.
SCOTT FOUND
February 19, 2002
Scott Walker is found! It appears that Stiff Kittie is together again as Scott Walker the drummer of the band returned
home yesterday. Walker had been missing since January 5, when it was reported by his mommy that he had been missing. Early
today, Walker met at a press confrence to explain his disappearance... "I was reading my Better Homes and Gardens magazine and
i remember running to the phone to tell Kevin about something amazing I had read about. Kevin loves that home decor stuff.
I tripped over my cat Kittie and, thats all I remember... next thing i know I am in a polka bar in North
Dakota dancing with a woman named Helga. After realizing I had been in North Dakota for over a month,
I knew I had to hurry home." Doctors conclude that he had experienced a tramatic multi-bipolar chronic acute
amnesiosis (severe amnesia). He should be fine and Stiff Kittie recording is planned to continue until their summer-scheduled
debut album is released. Nothing stops this band!!
E.T. ARRESTED
January 24, 2002
Late Wednesday evening, E.T., the new DJ of Stiff Kittie was arrested for indecent exposure and a D.U.I., E.T. told reporters,
"beeeerr, yummm." Kevin and Steve have ",no comment."
...and Searches continue for Stiff Kittie's 5th member Scott walker.
Authorities feel he was either abducted by someone or was suffering from a severe amnesia and living in the wilderness. If
that were the case Sergeant Stovers feels "he would most likely be living in a cave without food or clothing forcing him to
hunt for birds and small rodents."
SCOTT MISSING
January 20, 2002
It appears Scott Walker of Stiff Kittie is missing. Reports say he has been missing for about 2 weeks. When the
remaining members of Stiff Kittie were asked about the incident they could only reply, "What? Scott is missing???"
STIFF KITTIE SELECTS ET AS NEW DJ
December 28, 2001
Speculations were right Stiff Kittie has in fact chosen Actor E.T. Extra-Terrestrial as their official DJ. It is rumored
that former Attorney General Janet Reno was the bands final cut, but was later given the boot after a love affair with one
of the members turning bitter. The band then chose their runner-up E.T. whom they feel was the better choice after all.
STIFF KITTIE ANNOUNCES NEW DJ
December 22, 2001
Stiff Kittie last week announced that they had in fact selected a new DJ. Sources Thursday say that the band has chosen
former actor/film star E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial as the lucky pick. When E.T. was confronted outside his L.A. home his only
reply was, "beeeeer."
STIFF KITTIE CHRISTMAS ALBUM
December 3, 2001
Stiff Kittie is releasing a Christmas album! Although it is not sure yet whether the album will be released this year
it is certain that the band will release a single of their album this Christmas season entitled "Supermodels for x-mas." Unlike
other Christmas albums Stiff Kittie promises a holliday CD packed with Stiff Kittie Christmas originals. "Should be Christmas
fun for the entire family," says Kevin Stilwell.
BANDS SONG APPEARS ON DAWSONS CREEK EPISODE
November 12, 2001
The song "Cabernet in the Parlor" was played last night over the closing credits on "Dawson's Creek." It fit the plot
perfectly, and it was great to hear a favorite song unexpectedly.
-Stiff Kittie News Headquarters
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